Saturday, July 5, 2008

THE BOO FACTOR.

I love flipping people off. There is a certain kind of satisfaction you get from giving someone the finger. You just get to shove your hand out there and everyone understands what you're saying, no matter where you are in the world. However, I recently came to the realization that when I flip someone off it kind of makes me a little angsty and angry. And the majority of flippage I usually do is when I am behind the wheel and someone else is driving like a douche. I found that when I would flip them off, I'd get even more angry than I was before. I realized that it was a bad cycle and also kind of mean. So, I have started an anti-road rage movement and I call it "Boos not Bombs." And I'm not talking about boo, like how Alycia Keys is Usher's boo. Cuz she is. Or how you call your bestie your "boo." Cuz they are.

Allow me to explain:

If you are driving and there is a douchey driver who cuts you off and really deserves the finger, don't flip them off. Instead, drive by them, give them the thumbs down and mouth, "BOOOOOO" really obviously while shaking your head from side to side in disapproval (you can go right to left or left to right...take your pick, but you DO have to shake your head). Here are some visual suggestions:

If you're feeling feisty, there is the ANGRY BOO:


Or if their bad driving made you sad, there is the SAD BOO:


And, the worst kind of boo is the I'M DISAPPOINTED IN YOU LIKE-MOM-WAS-THE-TIME-I-SNUCK-OUT-OF-MY-WINDOW-IN-
THE-MIDDLE-OF-THE-NIGHT-MY-
JUNIOR-YEAR-TO-GO-TO-THAT-PARTY BOO:


Because everyone feels their worstest when someone says they aren't angry, just disappointed in them. Absolute worstest.

Here are the benefits:
1. You will end up laughing hysterically after you do it instead of feeling angry
2. The expression on the person you are booing will be priceless, and sometimes they even end up laughing
3. The person you boo (shall we say the boo-ee?) will end up feeling kind of badly and they will think to themselves, "hey, she was right. and it was so nice of her not to flip me off." And you, the boo-er, will have helped end the vicious cycle of road rage and you will be making the streets a safer place to motor.

Put away your middle finger, use those thumbs, and start booing.


*Please note these photos have been taken immediately post-4th of July wake-up/drive home and, like, maybe I haven't showered yet. I mean, like, I did..........n't.

5 comments:

sarahsouth said...

i was squeaking in laughter after every single line in this post. OMG you're genius

Jessica said...

That's great!

MAC said...

Thank you!! You know me, just trying to make the world a safer place one middle finger at a time.

Sarah said...

I believe a more accurate title for the campaign would be "Boos not Birds."

-DW- said...

Yes, "boos not birds" is brilliant. But the whole idea is an excellent one -- two thumbs up!