Sunday, May 24, 2009

THAT CAN'T BE COMFORTABLE. OR, I KNOW YOU'RE CHAFFING.

I need to address something that is starting to really concern me.

Let me start by saying this: I love to exercise. I am one of those weird people who finds it extraordinarily enjoyable, I have to work out at least 5 days a week or I start to feel, and go, bananas. I also fully support and give mad props to anyone who takes the time to go to the gym, or go for a run, or walk because you can't slam someone who is taking steps towards living a healthy life.

However...

You can express concern, confusion, befuddlement, uncomfortableness, and flabbergastidiousness when you see someone working out in


JEANS.

Three times this past week I saw folks working out at my gym, doing various activities ranging from lifting weights to running (yes, running), wearing jeans. I have absolutely no idea what would possess a person to say to themselves, "Yo, Self! Let's put on some denim and do some sprints!" To me that is like thinking it is a good idea to take some sand paper and fiercely rub it all over your epidermis. Or, like wanting to stick your nose into a teenage boy's armpit before he's discovered deoderant. Or, like wanting to give yourself a really bad wedgie/camel toe and do some fan kicks. The idea of working out in jeans just sounds so outrageously uncomfortable and utterly absurd to me.

I DON'T GET IT.

The only reason why I could potentially understand it is if you are in the middle of your work day, you left your gym clothes at home by accident, and you will have no other time to get a work out in if you don't go right at that exact moment. But, riddle me this: if you are at the gym and it is the middle of your work day and you have no other choice but to go in with your jeans on, why would you have your sneakers with you? Is it because you can wear sneakers to work? And, why did I see a husband and wife couple lifting weights and jogging on the treadmills wearing jeans?

AGAIN: I DON'T GET IT.

Please, please, please put on some other kind of clothing for your lower body. I honestly would rather see someone wearing spandex without a jock-strap than watch someone work out in jeans. All I can think of is how freakishly uncomfortable they must be, how sweaty and stanky and yucky it must be in their pants, and how they are definitely getting chaffed

This needs to stop.

You can change the world by changing your pants. So, for the love of Nike, just do it.

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